YO

I haven't written in awhile. Been super busy doing all the things that let me procrastinate from doing my homework, you know, the usual.

I'm feeling good. Had a great sleep last night. Slept with my window open and cuddled up in my blankets. I was the perfect temperature.

I've been thinking. If the magic isn't there, it isn't there. People can say all they want to say and say all the right things, and say everything I've ever wanted to hear, but if it isn't shared, if it isn't mutual, if I can't say those things back and really really mean them, then I shouldn't feel bad for not feeling the same way. Right?

I'm not a bitch for being picky. I feel like a jerk... and maybe I am in some peoples eyes, even my own sometimes. But I'm not hurting anyone intentionally and I can't settle just because I feel bad. I need what I need, I don't control my feelings to the same extent some people do.

I can't hide my feelings and I can't fabricate certain feelings because it would be convenient.

Ya.